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"You can tune a piano
but you can't tuna fish."
MARY BROWN
CHASKA, MINNESOTA
visiting during choir practice.
Out of scale.
"He's one in a million."
AUNT SHARLENE DROWN
MINNEOTA, MINNESOTA
about the editor's husband
as we spent time together in Las Vegas.
It's six billion
"You are one in six billion."
ALLAN ORSEN
to the editor
after spending time in Las Vegas.
Would you put it in small bills?
"Change is a gift.
It gives us
the opportunity to grow."
From the BALLAD OF LUCY WHIPPLE
SUNDAY NIGHT MOVIE
Into a larger denomination.
"Relax! Rome wasn't built
in a day. Of course,
you weren't alive then."
NOEL ORSEN
MINNEOTA, MINNESOTA
to the editor preparing dinner.
Render unto Caesar.
"Your liver is not made
to be pickled."
MOTHER ANGELICA
EWTN
Fried with onions?
"If we don't speak out against bad behavior,
we are guilty
of bad behavior."
BILL O'REILLY
FOX NEWS
Say five Hail Mary's.
"Is anything beneath
this man's dignity?"
TONY SNOW
FOX NEWS
about Clinton.
His Achilles heel.
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